Ten Things I Have Learned About Grief

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1. It is not quantifiable or measurable.  Mostly because in the dance, it changes.  It changes direction, takes me places I do not expect it to when I least expect it to.  All the while, changing me.  

2. There is a difference between being alone in grief and being lonely in grief.  As you walk the road that is uniquely yours, do not let loneliness settle in.  If someone offers to share your load, accept.  If someone offers to walk with you for a stretch, let them.  And when there is no one, there is always The One.

3. Laughter is essential.  Maybe not in this particular moment, but certainly in some moments.  When life is heavy, balance it with something light.

4. Time does not heal.  God heals, and in His time.  

5. God has a purpose in allowing grief.  Faith opens doors that resistance cannot.   

6. Do not try to control grief, or let grief control you.  In the dance keep moving.  Do not be afraid to let grief lead, but do not let it lead you in a downward spiral.

7.  You cannot numb the pain of losing love without numbing yourself in some measure, to what makes the presence of love so satisfying.

8. It is tempting to seek the Comforter in the  particular forms in which we think He might come to us.  We must remember that He may choose another way.  Even in that, He will comfort.

9.  What you feel in a moment is not what you will always feel.  There really is…

        “..a time to weep,and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;” Ecclesiastes 3:4

   10. The deepest healing takes place in the highest places, which we have yet to experience.

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